2004-05-05
I'm married

It's finally happened. There are a few pigs in the clouds rather annoyed with me, and a few demons are complaining about frostbite while the damned have a snowball fight, but I don't care since I'm happy and I'm married.

It was a beautiful wedding. She was beautiful, the most beautiful I've ever seen her, and I never wanted the moment to end as I was holding her hand there on the beach while we said our vows. Then we had a joyous reception, and I was the happiest I've ever been in my entire life. There is no moment I've ever been through that can compare.

It's positively un-gothic to be this happy. I just can't be gloomy. Oh, the angst! The angst is gone!

The honeymoon isn't yet. She has to wait for the semester to be over.

Now we have to settle down to the nitty gritty of being married. It's slowly seeping though each level of my awareness that it's happened, and each new level brings that new joy to that level. But there has been nitty gritty.

Weddings are expensive, and until the month is over neither of us will be able to afford much more than Ramen. Ok, Cheerios and milk.

This is a worry that is threatening to bring down my mood. I really want to be a good provider. I really want to make everyting comfortable and nice for her. I want to take care of her more than I have anyone else.

Do all men have these worries?

<-- -->